Chapter 40 1975 - The tour ends

The 1974-1975 world tour had been a great success for the band, with the exception of Isaac’s meltdown, and especially for I. As the only songwriter, I received vast amounts of royalties from the sales of their records, and a larger take of the tickets sales for their concerts. Every show was sold out, and 275 performances after their first show of the tour, they were wrapping it up in their home town.

Traditionally, they liked to introduce themselves with the Golden Fingers Theme.


We're the world's best rock and roll band
Listen to what I say.
If you came to see what was planned
Don't expect it to turn out that way.

Music fills every ear.
Its presence is never in doubt.
The sweet melodic lines you will hear.
Will seem to never run out.

Now you've seen and heard the best.
Can't believe your eyes.
So much better than all of the rest.
Stick with us if you're wise.

As the final chords died down, the tumultuous applause continued. I signaled the crowd for quiet.

“That song pretty much sums it up, don’t you think?” he asked them. Applause broke out again, and it was a full five minutes before I could get the crowd quiet again.

“Well, you’ve just heard about the World’s Greatest Band,” and the applause starts up again, crowds frantically trying to rush the stage, kids filling the aisles. I once again called for quiet, “Don’t make me come out there!”

The comment had the opposite effect, with the crowd pleading for him to join them, so they could touch their god, as they might classify him. I yelled out, and it reverberated through the hall. “Quiet!!!!”

A hush fell over and I continued, “Yes, you’ve just heard the World’s Greatest Band,” a swell began, but I suppressed it by holding up his hand. “But now you get to hear the World’s Greatest Me!”

The group started to rock into the new song “Today,” which had hit the charts at number one earlier in the year. The crowd was so loud, they could barely hear the lyrics:

Today
Is your lucky day
You get to hear me play
Declare a holiday!

Today
You just can't just get away
I have you in my sway
Not just another day

And now you'll hear
As you draw near
It's my year!

Today
Is a special day
You got to hear me play
You'll never get away

Today
Is not just any day
It's a holiday
Now let's just slip away

And you've just heard
The one true word
When I appeared

The crowd could not get enough. Fans all the way from the back of the hall were pushing though, some even climbing over the tops of the crowd to get near the stage. The frenzy was overwhelming, and rather than trying to calm them down for more patter, Golden Fingers launched directly in the next song “A Most Amazing Man.”

A fan cried out from the first row. “Where’s the story? We need the story, man!”

The fans knew every aspect of the show, even the patter between, and they did not want to miss even the smallest part of the experience. Isaac hit a final chord, and the crowd, quieted.

“You know,” began I. “I've got to tell you a little story. I've seen many bands in my time and they all have one thing in common: a bass player. Some don't have a guitarist, some don't have a singer, some don't have a keyboard man or a drummer, and, believe it or not, some don't even have a cello player. But I've never seen one without a bass player.”

The crowd went wild again. When the roar subsided, I closed in on the microphone, lowered his voice, and said conspiratorially, “Keep your mouth shut if you have.”

The crowd could not contain itself, and pandemonium nearly broke out. I once again expressed his calming influence.

“Anyway, the bass player is the most important member of any group. Therefore, since this is the World's Most Amazing Band, I must be the World's Most Amazing Man!”

This time, the band launched into the song so powerfully that the crowd immediately silenced in complete awe. The words rang out:

Am I not a most amazing man?
Am I not a most amazing man?
Here I am at the top of the world
And to me all the flags are unfurled
And I always have first choice of girls
What a most amazing man!
I'm a most amazing man!

Am I not a most amazing man?
Am I not a most amazing man?
Watch my fingers fly as I play my guitar.
Watch me at a party and I'll be a star.
Watch me come in first place when I race my car.
I'm a most amazing man!
I'm a most amazing man!

I have to agree when I look at myself
I know that I'm the best
And comparing myself with somebody else,
I leave behind all the rest.
How can I be so perfect?
I'm a most amazing man!
I'm a most amazing man!